When ever I would come across the famous quote Marriages Are Made In Heaven And Celebrated on Earth, I would think to myself what does that even means until I got married to a stranger who now is my best friend.
Friends and followers keep asking me If I have adjusted to the change, how my married life is coming along. If coping with an arrange marriage is difficult and how long it took me to settle down. Well, Marriage is not about a perfect couple living together its when an imperfect couple enjoy their differences. Giving up and leaving is the easiest way out but fighting and standing strong is the key to a successful marriage.
It has not been long that I got married and I follow NO rules but I have highlighted a few tips.
Be Friends: After knowing you have to spend the rest of your life with your partner, Become friends first. Don’t push too hard and take it slow. Make jokes, gossip and understand each other and stay focused when spending time together.
Keep No Secrets: Don’t take anyone’s advice when told to keep things from your partner. After you have become friends and you’ve built understanding start with sharing small secrets. Enjoy having a soul mate and partner on your side.
Don’t Get Angry At The Same Time: There are agreements and disagreements in every relationship especially when you are living with someone so close. If you don’t like what your partner is suggesting or you disagree to the idea or you are in a fight, Keep your sanity. Stay calm and give each other some time. Once the situation is cooled down explain your point of view.
Give Space: Remember! before you started sharing his room he had a life of his own and you had yours. Give each other some room and space. Let him have some time while you can make him a meal that you can share together.
Never Spy Or Doubt: If you think something is fishy and unusual or If u hear a part of some conversation don’t go on a secret mission of spying on him or give room to doubts in your heart. Walk up to him and tell him how you feel and ask what ever is in your heart directly.
Watch A Show Together: Pick a show and watch it together with some snacks before going to bed. Make small comments in between to make it interesting.
Date Night: To keep the charm alive date your partner, Make plans ahead of time and send him a reminder message in the morning of the day you have plans for. Pick clothes for him and Let him chose for you. If you have a baby or kids take help from family or friends to watch them while you spend a couple of hours together.
Defend Your Partner: The best feeling is to have your partner on your side. Defend him even when he is wrong and don’t make him feel alone or left out. You can take him to a side and tell him about his mistakes.
Have Common Friends: I have read numerous blogs were its suggested to have different friends than your partners. But I believe in having common friends. Host Pot-lucks, Game Nights, Celebrate small occasions and have everyone over. Even when you make new friends besides your partner’s introduce their spouses to yours. This way you’ll have a bigger group of friends to have fun with.
Make Trips And Explore: Every alternate weekend pick a new place to try be it a restaurant/cafe or an activity hub. Start saving from the beginning of the year for a long trip to explore new cities or different countries. Read about their cultures and occasions before planning the trip.
Charm And Attraction: Superficial and materialistic things don’t matter in a strong relationship. Don’t try too hard to be what you’re not. Keep it original, He married you for what you are, If your partner cannot appreciate you or is not attracted to you. Forget it and Love yourself and Become your own Best friend. Self Confidence is the charm to your personality which makes it attractive.
Respect And Appreciate: No relationship can survive for long without respect or appreciation. Never make your partner feel unloved or treat him with disrespect. The best time to appreciate your partner is when with family or friends. Highlight his efforts for you. Show him off ! And thank him when alone.
Give respect all times, There is a thin line between disagreeing and being disrespectful. Art is to know which one not to cross.
Forgive, Forget And Grow: Every person stands a chance. Forgive and forget a couple of times but don’t be a fool to make it a habit. Tell him how it hurts you and affects your relationship and give each other a fair chance to grow.
SMILE: Take control and be head strong, Smile even when it hurts
I hope these pointers help you in some way. Your Feedback will be appreciated